Letters to The Old Codgers

From: Jimmy “Clean Shorts” Floyd- H.

I was back complaining to the club Doctor the other day of more haemorrhoid trouble and after a particularly painful examination he gave me the usual ineffective cream. He said I should spend less time sitting around and should exercise more. For relaxation he recommended reading the Grapes of Wrath.
“us old ‘uns sympathise with you Jimmy. Funny we always thought you had piles of money”

From : “Handsfree” Dowie.

Just a short note to all my many admirers back at the Valley. I love all this new technology. With my latest bluetooth I can be contacted and made aware of any career news or networking opportunities straight away. Earlier in the year I could hear voices telling me that members of the playing squad were planning to send me to Coventry. Sure enough a few weeks later I was there !
“us oldies can’t agree with you mate, don’t go much on all this new fangled techno stuff, but we all agree you’re a bit of a prat”

From: Schard n’ Freud.

This story is from an ex-pal of ours, “Spend it like” Millsey who recently sent us a card from his yacht moored down in Malaga. He was telling us how he was sitting back enjoying his midday cerveza -when he heard about the recent set of results and our position in the table. While he was laughing heartily at the news, Millsey slipped on the deck , tripped over a mooring line and fell on to the jetty. Fortunately he will be in traction for the next two months…oh how we all laughed at the story.
“what a tonic you two, had us old ‘uns in fits. Needed it too. Not much to laugh about down the Valley these days”