Saturday, 23 May 2009

Duck Soup

Well, what a week it's been for us MPs. While the good lady,missus Confidential looks through the Farrow & Ball paint chart to decide what colour to paint the new Duck Paviliion,I've been thinking about just why I would want to continue to represent the Great British Public as the barely-elected cabinet Minister For The Department Of Not Much At All. It would probably result in a trial by the Media which has now reached fever pitch and let's face it, who would want that bunch of investigative rats parked outside our beautifully crafted gates, 24-7 on expenses. Right now they are the new Power, the new Empire, they smell blood big time but what will be the outcome?
And what could I do back as an MP back in London ? Most of what we get to see as new press "initiatives" or laws are not passed by Westminster at all but by Europe.
Yes,that's right,that bunch of peculiar people who don't talk English but persist in using their own languages,with odd and bizarre customs,who we voted to be part of.Countries who like us are hostage to their own history and they're just across the channel(err..just like us here really) Is it any wonder that we feel powerless to really change the future? We need a leader, just like CAFC does.(So c'mon Reg) We need someone to make sense of what's going on, a leader who can stimulate our belief in a the future.
I've got to go now folks, Mrs Confidential wants an executive decision on the right F&B shade of organic green to paint the Palace du Canards.

Wednesday, 20 May 2009

Sorry Seems To Be The Easiest Word

After a day locked in meetings with his lawyers, Confidential has decided to make a statement concerning his future. It's believed that the statement refers to earlier accusations that Confidential has been claiming significant expenses connected to a so-called blog which although features on the Forever Charlton site,often has little or no Charlton related news or information and often just contains the incoherent and nostalgic ramblings of a Victor Meldrew figure who longs for the good old days. It's understood that despite writing only very occasional posts, Confidential claimed the purchase of a luxury penthouse overlooking the Valley ground was necessary to write the blog. What follows is the statement read by his lawyers.
"After looking into my own financial affairs and finding some irregularities which may be mis-understood by some members of the media I find that my position requires clarification. I have been informed by my accountant - who has since resigned his position - that certain errors now require me to say that I am profoundly sorry for the errors that occured.Hopefully this profound apology and the word sorry will put a line under this unfortunate episode and I can go on milking the system and pretend that I give a toss about doing my job properly "

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